Those killing words

(Version française :

Whether watching TV, listening to the radio, chatting or looking in the mirror, at one time or another, there are always one or a few sentences that cross our mind to qualify or judge someone or something. From childhood, we have been conditioned to value certain things rather than others. We have developed a sense of what is right and wrong, decent and indecent. Therefore, each time we found ourselves in front of a situation or a human behaviour that is different from what we think is right, little killing words tint our thoughts.

Some people don’t hesitate to verbalize whatever they think, allowing themselves total freedom of expression. Personally, I try not to say that kind of thoughts, which are usually words that don’t help anyone to improve, on the contrary. Nonetheless, those killing words still cross my mind even though I’m not looking for them. Actually, the reason why I decided to write about judging in this first post is because I observed myself a couple of time this week having criticism towards some of my “friends” on social media. And I am wondering why other people’s life choices are disturbing me. Why do I feel affected by things that have no impact on my own life? Who am I to believe that my way of living is better than someone else’s?

Before suggesting some solutions to eliminate criticism, I will explain why I think it is important to get rid of that kind of thoughts. Even if our thoughts are not verbalized, they create a kind of energetic print. And no, it is not visible and not measurable (I mean not yet), but like any other kind of waves, our body perceives them and react to them. A single bad thought towards someone might not do any difference in one’s life. Just as, it is likely that if you smoke a single cigarette in your whole life, it will not affect your health. However, when something is done repetitively, we lose track of the facts very quickly and have no idea of the volume it actually represents at the end. (If you don’t believe me, start collecting the waste of something you consume everyday. Do it for one year and you’ll be surprised. Sometimes, we need to have a visual support to understand our real impact.)

An example that I find interesting regarding the effects of our thoughts is Dr Masaru Emoto’s experiment on water. (Ref Also, here is an experiment easy to replicate at home, done on rice (ref )

Of course, it is easier to tell ourselves that our thoughts and words have no impact, but if they do and that we don’t take them into consideration, we are placing ourselves in a passive position, neglecting our own power on our existence. I find more interesting to believe that my words affect my reality, as this means that I choose how I build my life, that I’m not a victim of a social system. A lot of my own life experiences have also convinced me of the power of my thoughts; what I attract and push back in my environment using only my thoughts. I invite you to do your own experiment on the subject.

So how can we change?

First of all, when one of those judgemental thought crosses your mind, start by acknowledging it. They are usually critics in regards of what we consider perfect. Personally, as a woman, I find extremely difficult to accept my body as it is. Comments on my body received as I was young, by people from my family, added to what I saw in magazines and TV, and what I heard about other women’s bodies, have created in me a kind of ideal body that doesn’t exist, or at least, that I will never reach. Regardless that I’m aware of it, I still find difficult not to compare myself to others, which obviously results in judgements and critics!

Once we become aware of those polluting thoughts, expel them is not enough, because, at the second we loosen our control on our thoughts, they come back very fast! Then, what can we do? A principle, which I will probably repeat later on in further blog posts, is that to change something in us, we need to replace it by something else.

Also, if your thoughts have been turned in one direction for thirty years, be realistic, it will take more than three days to reverse them. A new habit will have to be created. For example, each time a negative thought about my body arises, I should learn to cancel it with a positive thought. Over time, the idea is to formulate the positive thought first. So, instead of having a negative cancelled by a positive to result in something neutral, if the positive thought becomes a second nature, my position will become one of construction rather than destruction.

I’m stopping here for now. I know I have work to do on myself. I hope this post will help you in your own journey. There is still so much to say on the subject, therefore, next week, I’ll continue with a similar notion, the idea of mirror, which continues the idea of judgement.

To help you develop your ability to get rid of judgments,I suggest to meditate on the following picture without trying to recognize anything.

Peace and light


Small enough to follow you everywhere! Featured Painting of the week: Meditation Tool 100-052517A

Some people find difficult to maintain a meditation practice while they travel on a regular basis and don’t go to a meditation retreat. As it is common to carry a book when we know we’ll have time to kill, why not carry with us our meditation tool? Which for sure, will remind us of the importance to stay balanced.

The meditation tools starting with number 100 measure 100mm by 100mm. As shown in the picture, these tiny paintings can easily fit in a handbag. I do recommend you wrap them with a bit of bubble wrap to keep them safe. They can follow you everywhere!

The thought of traveling with your painting sounds funny? Well, I’m sure if we would have told people from the 70s or 80s that, in 2018, everybody would carry along a small computer in their pocket to stay connected with the rest of the world at all time, they might have found the idea interesting but a bit exaggerated. Your cellphone allows you to stay connected with others, but is it helping you to stay connected with yourself?

Whether you are in a waiting room, on the plane, the bus, or in a hotel room, your meditation tool is available to you if you are for it.

The Meditation Tool 100-052517A is a unique painting.

Link to the online store for more choices :

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